As foreign as these two emotions sounds to the newly, in love couple, it is no doubt that there is a strong correlation between the two. Both are emotions and both are healthy. However, both can also become unhealthy for the simple fact that emotions do not follow rules of logic. They are simply there to give us information about how we feel, what is appealing to us, what we want more of, etc. Often times, leaving the "In Love" couple blinded to the true facts of these two very important emotions. Anger is a result of an unmet need. What occurs after a couple commits to each other on the basis of "love" is that needs were not identified, understood nor communicated to the other partner. Leaving this relationship vulnerable and susceptible to feelings of anger. It doesn't mean either of the party is a bad person, what this simply means is that neither of the involved parties understood what their needs in a relationship were prior to finding love. It is not in the midst of searching for love or during the initiation of a relationship that these things should be looked into. These things should be taken into careful consideration before the other person arrives. Part of understanding love means that you've applied logic to it. Love simply tells you that you are attracted to the person, that your time with them feels good, that you want more of it. However, it does not tell you if you are compatible in vision, values or culture and it definitely does not indicate that any of your needs will be met since you never identified them nor did you communicate them. Here are a few suggestions you might want to consider while taking a personal needs inventory of yourself:
1. What is your definition of love?
2. What family culture do you want to create?
3. How important is ongoing growth in your relationship?
4. Is being driven important?
5. What are your values?
6. What are your needs in an intimate relationship?
7. What are your financial future goals?
This is just a glimpse of suggestions that can go on and on to further help you breakdown what is most important to you and that will help you embark on a healthy journey to a fulfilling long lasting relationship that matches your values and your future vision.